Bohemian Rhapsody
by beanpaste-chan
Summary: Oh no! Iggy has turned Fang's precious garments pink! What will he do? Sing a classic Queen song, of course. What else would Iggy do?


**I do not own Maximum Ride or this Queen song. Really, I'm sorry, folks, but I don't. If I did, I'd proclaim it out to the world, but for real, I do not.**

**  
Alrighty then, another songfic. I love Queen, Bohemian Rhapsody is the best song ever. Absolute genius, so of course I had to make a Maximum Ride songfic. This won't be as amusing as Life's Gonna Suck, unfortunately.**

* * *

Iggy came staggering into the room with Fang hot on his heels.

"Iggy, you jerk," he shrieked. "You-"

Thankfully for Iggy, Max came in at the right time. "Whoa, whoa, whoa. What the heck's going on here?"

"Well, Iggy-"

"Fang, let Ig speak."

"Well... I... um, this will be somewhat better if I put this a bit differently."

The lights darkened, and Iggy was suddenly sitting on a wooden stool.

"_Is this the real life?_

_Is this just fantasy?  
Caught in a landslide_

_No escape from reality_

_Open your eyes_

_Look up to the skies and see  
I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy  
Because I'm easy come, easy go  
A little high, little low  
Anyway the wind blows, doesn't really matter to me, to me..."_

Iggy got off his stool and closed his eyes, clutching his chest. Finally, he dropped to his knees.

_"Mama, just killed a man..."_

Max gasped. "No freaking way! Iggy-"

"Shut up, it's part of the song," Iggy chided.

_"Put a gun against his head_

_Pulled my trigger, now he's dead_

_Mama, life had just begun_

_But now I've gone and thrown it all away!"_

Loud guitars started in. _I've heard this before,_ Max thought.

_"Mama, ooooh_

_Didn't mean to make you cry_

_If I'm not back again this time tomorrow_

_Carry on, carry on, as if nothing really matters..."_

Iggy smiled ruefully, and clutched his head in his hands.

_"Too late, my time has come_

_Sends shivers down my spine_

_Body's aching all the time_

_Goodbye everybody-I've got to go_

_Gotta leave you all and face the truth!_

_Mama, ooooh-"_

_"Any way the wind blows."_ Fang sang.

_"I don't want to die!_

_"I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all!"_

There was a short guitar solo that came from nowhere in particular. Max and Fang looked around for where the music was coming from.

_"I see a little silhouetto of a man_

_Scaramouch, scaramouch, will you do the fandango?_

_Thunderbolts and lightning- very very frightening me_

_Galileo, Galileo_

_Galileo, Galileo,_

_Galileo Figaro- magnifico!"_

Iggy plopped down on the floor, looking ready to angst. Or be admitted to the crazy house, you choose.

_"But I'm just a poor boy and nobody loves me," _sang Iggy.

_"He's just a poor boy from a poor family_

_Spare him his life from his monstrosity,"_ sang Max. Fang marveled at how quickly she had picked up on this.

_"Easy come, easy go,"_ sang the blind teen. _"Will you let me go?"_

_"Bismillah! No- we will not let you go!"_ sang Fang.

_"Let him go!"_ trilled Max.

_"Bismillah! No- we will not let you go!"_

_"Let him go!"_

_"Bismillah! No- we will not let you go!"_

_"Let him go!"_

_"Bismillah! No- we will not let you go!"_

_"Let me go!" _Iggy pleaded.

_"Never let you go!"_

_"Let me go!"_ warbled Iggy. From the next room, the Gasman, Angel, and Nudge applauded. The young'uns thought they should be on American Idol.

_"Never let me go! Ooooh! No, no, no, no, no, no, no- Oh, mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go! Beelzebub has a devil put aside for me, for me, for MEEEEE!"_

Finally, the strawberry-blond got up to his full imposing height. Fang stood in front of him, glowering.

_"So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye?_

_So you think you can love me and leave me to die?_

_Oh baby- can't do this to me, baby."_

Iggy started leaving the room.

_"Just gotta get out- just gotta get right out of here!"_

Fang cradled his head in his hands.

_"Ooooh yeah, ooooh yeah_

_Nothing really matters_

_Anyone can see_

_Nothing really matters- nothing really matters to me."_

The music from nowhere slowed. Iggy left the room, looking very emo.

"What the hell just happened?" asked Max.

"He turned all my favorite articles of clothing pink. I was gonna kick his ass, but the musical number was pretty good," said Fang. "Let's do something from Sweeney Todd next, 'kay?"

As her right-hand-man left whistling 'A Little Priest', Max stood in the kitchen of the borrowed house, befuddled. Why did they just have a musical number? And she knew where she had heard that song before, she just didn't know where...

* * *

**As I said, Queen is awesome. You have to listen to Bohemian Rhapsody. Anyway, please review!**

**beanpaste-chan out!**


End file.
